Holy Smokes the trees fell down - but no rich people got hurt, so all is well

Collective Intelligence

by Harv

I started playing golf when I turned 52, which is too late to become professional, however the computer tells me I’m in the top 34% of players in NZ, so that's flash for a very late starter. On a good day I enjoy golf, on others not so much.


I watch golf on TV sometimes, and because it coincided with Easter I got to watch some of the Masters played at Augusta over the weekend. We’ve got a Kiwi golfer playing in it so it makes it a bit more relevant too.


The National Augusta Golf Course (which is private) is an iconic and beautiful 147 ha of prime real estate. You have to be invited to become a member (I’m still waiting) with an initial sign up of US$40K and annual membership around US$10K. It's for the rich. They allowed their first black members in 1990 and in 2012 the first female members were initiated which gives a good lens of its history and cultural background. 


The Masters tournament is the one to win for the professionals. You go down in history if you do, and get a green jacket (which is a bit ironic).


Its grass is all the same colour of dark green, and it is perfectly mowed and clipped with snow white bunkers, to give a wonderful contrast, and lovely waterways without a hint of weed or nasty algae. There are thousands of different plants imported from around the world to give a stunning experience for all who attend, play, and watch on TV.

The course is immaculate, revered and a stunning spectacle of how people can groom a piece of land to look however they want, if enough money is spent on it.


The birdsong you can hear from the televised coverage is beautiful and can be dialled up or down because it’s an artificial recording.


The grass is always the same colour no matter the difference in the session from year to year because it’s watered with food dye (no idea what food dye is - but sounds grand)


Some professionals don’t like playing on it during other times of year because it stinks of chemicals.


Otherwise this golf course is a thing of beauty.


Unfortunately on the second day of the four day tournament, some trees fell down and the commentator said Holy Smokes I hope no one was hurt. Apparently no one was, although I’m sure there will be some lawsuits filed for trauma and shit like that.


I thought no human was hurt, but nature is being fucked right in front of our eyes and we can’t recognise it.

Through my eyes, I was looking at an artificial mono-cultured grove of trees where there was no interconnection between the trees and in the mild wind the Loblolly Pines (pinus taeda) which are native to the area, just fell over. In a natural setting, trees and actually all plants are interconnected with other species to share resources and look after each other. It’s called regeneration - it’s a beautiful thing that indigenous cultures have known about forever.


We could literally see that happening to the trees on the telly in front of our eyes, but what  we can’t see is the effect of all the chemicals, the artificial fertilisers, and the food dye (wtf is food dye) on the soil and bugs trying to live there. No wonder they have to play artificial birdsong. 


This whole 147ha spectacle is designed by the rich for the rich to play and watch golf, all the while destroying the environment in plain view. 


Some time ago before I started playing golf myself I had the great fortune to be introduced to Burton Silver who is a renowned cartoonist, writer and parodist. Burton was onto it years before most, understanding the harm via the use of chemicals on golf courses all around the world were doing. So he came up with an alternative called http://www.golfcross.com/introduction/burtonsilver.html and would hold tournaments around the world as a spoof to the major golf events. He’s quite the character and a bloody smart thinker. He was distraught at the harm being done to nature, especially on the precious greens.

There are days you go to a golf course and there will be a humorous sign saying ‘don’t lick your balls’. Everyone giggles, and it’s a great distraction to the fact the greens have been sprayed with a toxic mix of something. It's common and often.


I had a mate who managed a farm that was converted to a golf course by an American billionaire (they love doing this) His health became chronically affected due to the chemicals being applied to the farm to convert it to a golf course. Think about that for a minute. These wonderful open spaces are toxic just to play sports on.


Golf is only for the rich in many countries, and for the privileged in most. You need a spare four hours to play the game. How often is it that the privileged are causing harm to nature to make our lives more fun and convenient?


When will we accept that nature doesn’t look perfect and beautiful all the time? That to get us perfect unblemished vegetables for example we have created enormous waste and overheads - plus food that is sometimes filled with chemicals.


The loss of biodiversity is an even greater risk to humanity's future than the threat of climate change. Way bigger - at this rate we will have wiped out 50% of the existing species of insects, plants and animals in the next 40 years according to scientists - because we have many examples of Augusta.


Back to the Holy Smokes trees - they remind me of the pine forests grown in New Zealand. Recently I travelled on the Desert Road to Turangi and saw a devastated pine forest snapped and uprooted by Cyclone Gabrielle. It was a monoculture forest totally unnatural for our country.


Nearby was a large patch of Ngāhere, which is a Māori name for our native bush. It means interconnected. 


The Ngāhere was unaffected by the storm. Why? Because it has little trees supporting big trees, supporting medium trees, supporting little trees. 


The poor Loblolly trees on Augusta stand all alone so we can watch the golf better. 


No one was hurt when the three Loblollies fell, but nature is being undermined, so all is well, and now back to golf.

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